Thursday, July 23, 2009

I'm Obviously a Masochist

So, I have this thing I do, where whenever I find a game I like, I look up how it was reviewed on various sites, and occasionally wikipedia it. The review sites I tend to go onto are GameInformer, IGN, and (sometimes) Gamespy. In case you were wondering, this is a rant about GameInformer.

So, in case you didn't know, my recent game addiction is a 2D fighter titled Blazblue (not pronounced as it's spelt, and apparently the Japanese pronunciation is different than the American pronunciation). So, in my normal fashion, I went and looked up reviews, where most places said "THIS GAME IS AWESOME!" in many more words than that. However, once I got to GameInformer, I noticed that their numerical rating was much lower than the 9.5 average that every other place had (namely, a 7.75/10). In theory, I'm fine with this--not everyone is going to like a game, and so long as they give valid reasons as to why a score is given, I can live with it even if I don't agree. However, this was not the case with GameInformer. Their review consisted of three pretty small paragraphs, while every other place had pages (on a fucking fighting game to boot)!

Not being quick to judge, I read the review myself (it didn't take long--it was short), where they stated that they didn't like the inclusion of the story (yes, I will admit that it's story is kind've convoluted, but if you don't like the story, then just play the arcade mode....), stated that it looked gorgeous, and finally that the combat system is hard to pick up, mainly because each character has a special mechanic that goes with them. While many reviews, as well as personal experience, contradict this last point (sereously, I've never seen a fighting game where noobs have picked it up and kicked my ass so quickly....), I thought to myself, "Well, fighting games in general can just be hard to pick up and get good at, so maybe their complaint stems from that..."

Well, I then re-looked up the Street Fighter IV review, and my soul was crushed. SF4, just so you guys know, got a whopping 9.375/10 on GameInformer (that number is the average of the second opinion and the normal review), talking mostly about, for it's five, chuncky paragraphs about how the nostalgic feel of the game, the fact that characters work mostly the same as their past incarnations (thus making it easier to just "pick up", or as they say, "...familiarity with a character’s moves will ease the transition into the new mechanics."), and that the new characters, while they look ridiculous, offer something new, "They are pretty stupid characters, but I love the way they fill combat gaps and force you to learn new techniques," and finally ending by essentially saying that, while grasping the whole system and mastering the game would take a fuck-load of time, you don't have to master it to enjoy the game.

Now, to make my point clear, let's compare the points they made about SF4 to the points they made about BB:
  • BB looks amazing--no such thing was said about SF4, in fact, they pointed out that the new characters in SF4 looked bad.
  • They stated that, in SF4, that doing a Hadoken is as simple as doing a quarter-circle forward and then punch, making it pretty easy to pick up. I would like to point out that, in BB, most combos are carried out using the very same method, and that BB is actually more forgiving when inputting these combos (unlike SF4).
  • For SF4, GI states in it's conclusion: "Fighting games can be intimidating. Many are littered with impossible final bosses, overwhelming character selections, and complicated mechanics, but Street Fighter IV is a distillation of everything the genre does right. It delivers the intensity of competition and the thrill of victory, all through elegant techniques that are easy to learn and difficult to master." which is contradicted by the very game they are reviewing, as the final boss, Seth, is really fucking hard to beat because he has a move to counter just about everything any character can do, it has a rather hefty roster of 25 characters (note: BB has a roster of 12 characters), and it has moves that are so hard to pull off that I've had friends who have said that, "I play better [as SF4] when I stop trying to do stuff and just hit buttons".
Are we starting to see where I'm going with this? If not, I have more I can compare that, simply stated, is not at all expressed in GI's review (but is in IGN's review of BB--I don't honestly remember what they said about SF4):
  • SF4, with all of it's "simplicity", uses every single fucking button on the controller (minus the left two triggers, if you aren't counting buttons mapped to multiple button presses): Square being light punch, triangle being medium punch, R-top trigger being heavy punch, X being light kick, Circle being medium kick, and R-bottom trigger being heavy kick, and then having some button combos do specific things: Square and X together for a charge attack, Triangle and circle together to grab, as well as specific moves (like your Ultra Combos, which are not to be mistaken with your Super Combos, and some random teleports) requiring you to hit L-M-H attack together after a sometimes obfuscated (or simply just hard to actually pull off) d-pad combination, and then it has some extra, high-level stuff you can do that also requires multiple button presses (like insta-cancels). BlazBlue, on the other hand, has a very simple control scheme, the D-pad for movement, square, triangle, circle for l-m-h attacks (respectively), X for "drive attacks" (which employ the characters' special mechanic), triangle and circle at the same time to grab, and then all three attacks at the same time to do high level maneuvers (insta-cancel, gaurd counter). Go measure how long it took me to tell you BB's commands versus SF4's. I dare you.
  • SF4 is not balanced. To put it bluntly, there are characters in SF4 that suck fucking balls, and characters that are just better. BB, on the other hand, is incredibly well balanced. Sure, some characters are harder to use (Carl) than others (Nu-13), but if you were to take a character skilled at playing Carl and have them fight someone who was equally skilled with Nu, it would be a very close fight. For SF4, no matter how good you are, Balrog and Zangief are simply a whole lot fucking better characters than Guile.
Anyway, my ranting mood is starting to leave, and I kind've want to play BlazBlue some more (I just learned that you can map combos onto directions on the R-stick to employ a tactic much like c-sticking in Smash), so I'm going to conclude: SF4 is a very good, solid fighting game that I have enjoyed a lot, and has a lot of good things going for it. However, there is absolutely no fucking reason why it should get a 9.25/10 when BlazBlue, an arguably better game gets a 7.75/10. GameInformer's reviewers have obviously failed at doing their most important job: review and critiquing games from an objective standpoint, to help us judge how good a game is relative to its genre and to games as a whole before we go out and spend a lot of money of said game, and, due to their prominence as game-reviewers, this sickens me to no end.

G'Night and G'Luck.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Worst Plot Arc Ever

So, this time, I'm going to bitch about an anime. The anime in question is called Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu Season 2. Before I start my rant and analysis, I would like to point ou that the first season was *excellent* and is, by all means, worth watching. As of right now, however, the second season is very not worth watching. Also, if you don't like spoilers, just don't read this--I'm going to spoil story stuff.

Anyway, the stuff that happens in the second season happens before many of the episodes in the first season, but after the main plot arc of the first season. If you haven't seen the first season, this works out because the first season is not presented in chronological order, with more than half of the episodes taking place well after the main story arc.

Well, the first episode of the first season was entertaining--Kyon gets sent back in time and ends up initiating Haruhi to go to the high school she inevitably goes to, thus explaining a line that occurs in the second episode of the first season (where Haruhi randomly asks Kyon, "Do I know you from somewhere?"). It wasn't by far the best episode of the shows as a whole, but it was fun and entertaining. And then the second episode of the second season airs.

This episode is simply about the SOS-dan enjoying the last couple of weeks in their summer vacation in a very busy, yet relatively normal, fashion. Overall, this episode was okay--it wasn't particularly funny, but it was a nice change of pace...

A week later, I watch the third episode. As I start the episode, I actually have to double check that I in fact obtained the right episode because it starts exactly the same as the previous episode. After confirming this, I continue watching the episode, where I learn that it is the same exact episode except this time there is a scene explaining that everyone is stuck in an infinite time loop....

Well, I've now finished episode 6, and it's still the same episode (with some very minor differences, like different clothes). It has gotten VERY OLD. In fact, It got pretty old after seeing the same episode twice, much less FOUR FUCKING TIMES. The worst part yet is that they are showing no signs of the characters ever getting out of the loop, since the only character that actually remembers anything in any detail won't do anything. That and, the main male protagonist, Kyon, it too much of a dipshit. I'm pretty certain, given past events (namely, the end of the main arc from the first season), he could probably get out of the damn loop if he just asked Haruhi out on a date.

Anyway, that's really the end of the rant. I don't really have a problem with time loop plots, especially considering the content of this show (if you don't know what it's about, it's about a very eccentric girl named Haruhi who is essentially god, but doesn't know it), but you have to do them in a certain way, and the way Haruhi is doing it is most definintely bad.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Fallen to the Drarkside Have I?

So, due to a certain someone who will not be named, I've become a fan of the show Dead Like Me. This isn't really a problem and is, in fact, probably a good thing because it's a good show. However, it got me thinking and then realizing that I am, in fact, a very morbid person.

Of all of the things, especially comedies, that I am interested in, or have been interested in, a lot of them deal with death a lot. As a short list, we have The Darwin Awards, Dead Like Me, Pushing Daisies, and this one book I saw at B&N that I don't remember the name of that was essentially a dictionary/encyclopedia of ways to die.

After going through this in my head, I realized I'm a really morbid person, or, at the very least, I find death kind've funny. Am I alone in this? Probably not, since these comedies exist. So, I shall continue to be morbid and laugh at death!